whatever comes to mind

Mmmm... so enjoyed this.

> I am not 100% sure why, but I have been without any type > of subject matter, or ideas to write about in the past > week or so.

Since I started playing off others' verbiage, the postibilities have seemed endless.

> Regulate The Internet > > All of it. Make it so I don’t have to pay $10 (or more) > per month to enjoy music.

Regulation is to gazillions of mostly unconscious actions (e.g. clicks, views) summed instant to instant what voting every four years is to continuous lobbying.

> You fucking sheep! #RegulateTheInternet

How you gonna do that when sheep couldn't possibly have any idea what you're talking about?

Methinks the more appropriate hashtag is #FindTheMagicWandThatWhenWavedTransformsSheepIntoIntelligentHumanBeingsAtMassScale.

> My weekends have boozy eyelids that open and close > to the tune of the English rain. Now they're heavy to > crackling spa waters and chilly feet. It's not ideal, > but post-post-coitus is thoughts about the washing up gone > piled. There's simply no forks left.

Glorious text!

And, of course, for older timers like me, it's going to take a bit of time for the song “I Am The Walrus” invoked by the phrase “the English rain” to stop playing in our heads.

How this place looks to me on in a tmux window in a linux terminal on my chromebook per a command I wrote called “rwl” (“read write list”):

o) older r) refresh

How my most recent junk looks in the same environment, sorted by most to least views:

--- 1/1
39|The Gates of software hell|2020-01-10T15:14:33Z|2020-01-10T15:14:33Z|13pfffv4r2yauzsf
37|I've got the power - NOT|2020-01-08T20:40:27Z|2020-01-08T20:40:26Z|d8852s62ad830jic
32|Auditioning for the minimalism choir|2020-01-08T15:54:08Z|2020-01-08T15:54:07Z|juh6kblqkjxnt96g
31|It's been a hard post's write|2020-01-10T13:23:30Z|2020-01-10T13:23:30Z|ugcrxwlqj08ilkrh
30|Srsly? Where would you be were it not for ethanol?|2020-01-11T07:53:24Z|2020-01-11T07:53:24Z|nfp66ojhme6agkjm
30|When you're strange|2020-01-09T14:22:10Z|2020-01-09T14:22:10Z|v105rg015ga0n6ag
29|Sailing into the dinner hour|2020-01-09T23:47:31Z|2020-01-09T23:47:31Z|u8dk2b5pwnuytvv0
25|I'd like to cmake it with you|2020-01-07T17:27:21Z|2020-01-07T17:27:46Z|z507k15lo1y2c527
15|Write dot a s posts forever|2020-01-11T19:17:30Z|2020-01-11T19:17:29Z|332tst9zabyy9c4f
0|Saturday, in the blog, I think it is just north of my sighs|2020-01-11T21:00:18Z|2020-01-11T21:00:18Z|oua8axx6nw9ln9d4

I mean, who says Burger King is the only place you can have it your way?

> But what people get inside their minds just because their > news feeds show t to them, is not real. Their self-curated, > niche timeline of similarities are NOT what the real world > is all about.

Mind can't even grasp itself, let alone some “real” world it – haha – imagines exists....

Considering the dream more than a dream is one way of describing the only seeming problem.

It matters not at all how we i-dentify, but that we i-dentify....

> Dr. Bruce Banner. Do you remember this guy? If you happened > to be around my age and watched television on CBS between > 1977 to 1982, then you may just be famiIiar with him.

Doesn't ring a bell at all. I must have been watching the wrong kind of TV (was yours a Panasonic? because mine was an RCA...).

> My retreat to the backside of the green monster (the > chair was the same color as the was the 70's > after all) was only for a few seconds during the Gamma Ray > (???) process. The scary part was when Dr. Banner would > be triggered into a rage and transform into the Hulk.

Oh that... see, I was way too busy with a high school girlfriend at that point....

> Dr. Banner had to live as a hermit, a loner, > keeping everyone at arms length for fear he may be > triggered. Why? This was no fault of his own, it was > a lab accident gone wrong. The authorities pursued > him constantly, like a dark cloud chasing and taunting > him. It was as if he was prey seeking refuge until backed > into a corner, provoked until becoming predator was the > only option in some wicked combination that resulted in > explosive rage. This only soon reverted to an exhaustive > meltdown returning yet another vicious cycle. I remember > thinking, these guys have no friends and everyone needs > a friend. Hulk's only ally and Banner's only sure friend > was one in the same...lonesomeness.

Ohmydeity, just like a modern day blogger!

> As I begin writing on the prompt of #Bullying, I think of > the predator and the prey as a dynamic inside each of us > as humans. Is it simply that one is nurtured or harnessed, > one given more attention than the other at those more > crucial points in life? > > Could that be why I am more assertive and my wife so much > more of a timid soul?

Underlying mechanisms (e.g. biology) have no need to “understand” the flailing of properties emergent therefrom. All this hither and yon we're so consumed with/by means nothing to their slowly plodding machinations. As we wail and gnash our teeth over a botched Amazon order, they're acting slightly creatively above amness horizon to guarantee Joe Asshole-Enough-To-Survive-A-Little-Better cums hard enough in Josephine-Just-Good-Enough-Locks-To-Attractive-Slightly-Better-Survival-Plunderers to probably guarantee the next round maybe makes it to the next round... and so on and so forth....

Which, of course, is abhorrent to us “woke” emergent-from-that-bio-soup-mess “individuals”... blah blah blah.

But it's not like our modelings of it actually matter, because the “forces that be” are safely below the modeling space (emergent from that biology) in which we seeming live and breathe and have our be-ing....

> This is not a prompt about psychology by any means. I am > just sharing my thoughts, thats what writing is all about > — READ.THINK.WRITE!

Of course!

I mean, none of us are ever imagining we're ever forcing anything on any others... we're always just “being who we are”, or “expressing ourselves”, or <cough> whatever the fuck(ing modeling we inwardly champion...).

> BTW: please check thislink and listen this piece call > “The Lonely Man” that was the tune that played to the > TV Series on CBS in the 70's

I wish, but I really don't have time – especially since a new season of “Schitt's Creek” is allegedly available!

> “Wine (alcohol) is a mocker, strong drink (alcoholic > spirits) is a brawler, and whoever is led astray > (intoxicated) by them is not wise.” – Proverbs 20:1


> Do not use alcohol in the Eucharist. Alcohol is a > depressant-type drug. It is obvious that the etymology of > alcohol is from the Arabic word: Algol. Algol, or al-ghul, > is Arabic for “the Demon”. Those who drink and depend > on alcohol begin to fall under an intoxicating spell of > Algol, which results in possession of Algol. Drinking > alcohol while intoxicated will turn humans into beggars; > even worse, those who refuse to renounce the demonic vice > of alcohol will pave their own roads to their own grave, > or to the Abyss.

But but but but but.. it's fantastic while reading and/or writing posts!

> The wine that I, Juan Mirieth Auriel, recommend for the > Eucharist is Kosher, non-alcoholic grape juice. The brands > that I recommend are Lakewood, De La Rosa, or Kedem as > long as these brands are only non-alcoholic.

<pinches nose while grimacing>

So the weekend is seemingly upon as again (“seemingly” because of course days of the week are quite arbitrary).

It's rather gosh-danged dreary grey outside at the moment, albeit warm for January here (now 46F, high of 50F forecast). I imagine some consider that proof the world is ending.

My new philosophy on politicians to vote for goes like this: “I'd rather have a nutcase doing what I elected them to do than a self-proclaimed/assessed 'woke-ian' doing anything and/or everything but.” The latter qualify as swamp monsters in my book.

My final dream last night had me in row two for an Alanis performance that was just about to begin when my partner's alarm went off. Now that's what I call ironic!

I've become aware of an open position for director of a local historic venue. I can't imagine anyone considering me qualified, but I sure would like to try something like that whilst walking away from software development with both middle fingers blazing. I'm just so tired of most others' focus/demands on UI, of things that ought to stay the same changing out from under my feet (in my current position because the IT folk value the self-righteousness of blindly installing Windows updates over application/integration stability).

I may have mentioned giving Powershell a glance the last couple days, hitting a major roadblock in that there seems to be no way to obtain http response body content from the Invoke-WebRequest cmdlet if/when it throws an exception on certain http failure status codes – although the response body content is piped to the console if one doesn't try/catch the call... so it appears I'm going to have to create a convoluted pipeline-ish solution so the first script can call Invoke-WebRequest without catching exceptions, piping the output of that to a second script that can parse the response body content from that, and proceed... it's 2020 for fuckssakes, Microsoft.....

I acquired the open source Powershell 6 to see if perhaps that's fixed therein, but of course right off the bat $Env:PSModulePath is different enough in Powershell 6 than it was in Powershell 5 that Import-Module was failing... yet another case of Microsoftian “pull the rug out from underneath something that was working just fine”.

Just another day in the nightmare that made Bill Gates rich for having signed on to a position in a Windows shop!

> I feel like I am spending my life desperately wanting a > man to commit to me. To love me unconditionally.

I could be wrong, but I get the feeling you've landed on the wrong planet for that, because I can't so much as find a single person that, after drinking soda/pop from a can, puts the can in a recycling bin instead of either the regular garbage, or just anywhere around the house.

(And, of course, I mean first emptying the can before doing that – which itself seems to be rocket science for this species.)

> No one ever taught me how to love myself. My mother showed > me how to show others love. But that's nowhere near as > useful as she hoped It would be.

How dare she show you how to show others love without also showing you how to be patient for how long it takes for showing others love to seem to matter! :–)

> I am reminded that there is a flash flood warning in > effect. I will more than likely be living on Oakville > Island in the next 24 hours because when everything > floods, all major roads are closed except for Highway 55. > Summer 2019 saw Flood Of 1993 levels here in STL but > it didn’t make the news because too much bad shit was > happening everywhere else to deem it newsworthy. Our planet > is fucked.

Because of some flooding in a miniscule portion of it?

<next morning>

> Without God, everything is permitted > > With God, everything is commanded.

To a self.

Lose that, and God

<intentional non-ending>

> I apologize if you have found this blog. I occasionally > write here, but I do not accept any responsibility for > any damage caused by me writing here.

Seems fine to me.

Bring it!

> Let there be a garden on the bare earth I lived.

I'm liking that as an over-guiding principle for how to live and, with a modicum of planning and rigor, leave things.

> Zero punctuation is zero rhythm. > > Color with no outline. Raw.

Whitespace and/or newlines can be effective (especially in a fixed font).

> 'I meet another drifter on the fringes.. a settler, a > Shaman of the dispossessed with inky black glyphs marking > the backs of his hands — he shows me how to access the > old energies to decode the tags graffed up and down the > walls, ..liminal sigils he calls them'

I'd hoped for the same in blogging spaces, but thus far have wound up infinitely empty relative to what the old Craigslist “Strictly Platonic” forum did for me.

Ever notice how words are never about anything other than other words?

Such is the modeling realm in which the model we call 'I' is said (i.e. worded) to exist.

Hence, “In the beginning (of the modeling realm?) was The Word”....?

Just wondering out-screen!

> I'd like to keep you for a really long time.

<hilarious laughter>

No disrespect intended. It's simply one of those things that takes time to figger.

> To find your handle, go into your blog's settings. Under > Updates will be your blog's fediverse handle, following > the format “”.

Oh, wow, thanks!

> Are you concerned about the encroaching efforts of the > liberal agenda on the 2nd amendment? > > Does the freedom of speech provided by our > U.S. Constitution even seem to be relevant in out > “Cancel” culture anymore?

It's their prerogative. I think it's making them look at least as silly as the 1980s fundamentalist Christians they so loved mocking back in those days (see also: hypocrisy amplification). But fundamentalism blinds regardless the specifics, so....

        people are strange
      when you're a stranger
         faces look ugly
        when you're alone
          - The Doors

I mean, like, did Jim Morrison invent blogging or what?!


> In my experience, once I tried writing to an audience, > it felt like I got a new job. I'll stick to writing for > myself as a fun hobby.

Bravo! Bravo!

(and lots of inner “Hear! Hear!“s as well)

> Decided (on impulse, but a good impulse) to throw away > the tobacco pipe + the small amount of tobacco I had + > the few pipe accessories I had. They are at the bottom of > the dumpster now, and I have nicotine lozenges to replace > it. I am getting a new fill of lozenges tomorrow, too, > so that is good.

I'd sort of started smoking again more often than was wise, and just the other night handed about half a pack of Newports to a much younger fellow in the casino, which earned me what seemed a rather heartfelt “God bless you!” :–)

I'm sipping a glorious 92 proof white whiskey to this brief posting session.

<next morning>

> Right now, there are a lot of people who would > consider themselves “influencers” on the WWW. Some > (few, in fact) work very hard for their hard-earned > “status”. But others, I call PRIVFLUENCERS are nothing > more than rich people who are using their income (usually > sourced by their parents) to play the influencer game, > but have no “story” or “credits” behind them. It is > more a game of “I’m rich! Look at me go!” and people > all watch and sing along and post quotes from the person > on Facebook or Snapchat or wherever they waste their lives.

Egos and ego-aka-i-dolaters thereof? Old game, really. Even the old book (or collection of books) that lots of the most self-proclaim-edly “woke” egos love to hate (i.e. “The Bible”) mentions it a few times.

> What would it be like to live under the control of > a regime?

I only know what it's like to live under an alternating two. ;–)

> Minimalism is partially about ridding oneself of the > outward signs of success.

And perhaps mostly about minimal want (i.e. inner sense of lack)?

Jury duty in a couple weeks. Looking forward to it! It'll be a nice, refreshing break from judging others online. :–)